Book Review: “Unconditional Parenting” by Alfie Kohn. I often recommended to parents an article by Alfie Kohn called “5 Reasons to Stop Saying Good. Unconditional Parenting has ratings and reviews. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by. 54 quotes from Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason: ‘Even before i had children, I knew that being a parent w.

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Thanks for telling us about the problem. Good use of gravity!

View all 57 comments. Visit the store to see all her work. I actually read most of this a couple of years previously, but gave my copy to a friend who was having a baby before finishing it. If your kid does something bad, try to explain why it was bad and invoke empathy as much as possible have their actions affected someone else, perhaps?

The child may still feel frustrated, but ideally she parennting feel unloved. I’m a middle-of-the-road Democrat. You can find out more about Alfie Kohn at his website, http: Kohn pretty much tells us that he’s being vague because he doesn’t want parents to be following formulas to raise their children.

Don’t stick your no’s in unnecessarily: Give your children the benefit of the doubt, attribute the best possible motive consistent with the facts. Relationship Repair after an Affair: Time outs are a form of love withdrawal, not good. I haven’t actually read the whole book thus my lack of a star rating here. Children are actually less sucessful at a task when they are offered a reward.


I love those pictures! I couldn’t have predicted how relieved I’d be to learn that other peoples children struggle with the same issues, and act in some of the same uncondotional, mine do. And the cornerstone of being a good parent is being able to identify and understand your own feelings and motivations. It’s true that you can’t just administer serotonin to your child like a lab rat, but you can communicate what you think is good behavior without it being an attempt to control.

Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn

I also agree that traditional punishments are seldom affective, which is why they have to be repeated so often. Kohn would argue that he does in fact place restrictions on his children’s behavior.

It’s who sets them: Turn praise into questions that elicit thinking. He has a good point – there’s clearly no one-size-fits-all solution for parenting.

Jan 27, Nata rated it it was amazing Shelves: I largely agree with this book’s argument–that punishments including time out and subtler “love-withdrawal” reactions and even apfie including a constant stream of “good job! His questioning of the very popular practices of overzealous praise and time-outs were probably most useful to me, as they gave me pause about things I would likely do simply because I am surrounded by that mentality.


10 Principles of Unconditional Parenting

But I am not a mere object in my child’s growth. Click here to receive the Show Guide for Alfie Kohn.

From Problems to Passion with Katie Hendricks Change how you see not just how you act. That unconditionl being said, I think I agree with him. I listen to them when they give reasons of why they didn’t hand in their homework, but Alvie make it clear that I expect their behavior to change anyway. We are so worried about spoiling kids that we often end up overcontrolling them. The Power of Deep Relating Love Without Strings Attached What to Minimize Being selective about what we object to or forbid makes the “no” count pqrenting more on those occasions when we really do have to say it.

Timeouts as a form of “love withdrawal” being one of them. We have new posts each day by talented authors providing us with insight into why gentle parenting is worth your time and how to implement it on a daily basis. Remember to see things from the child’s perspective And so it is in families.

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